Antron Johnson was born to a single parent, and at age ten his mother became a Christian. "That’s when my world began to change," he says, while sitting on his couch at home as his daughter, Latoya, roams around in her pink and blue playmate bicycle, and his wife prepares ice tea in the kitchen. From the outside anyone would say that this is a typical family, but once you sit down and talk to this young couple, both 24, you begin to see the many trials they’ve endured together. And in the midst of a possible divorce, how they both declared victory in the Lord.

Antron is an experienced Navy officer, who spent most of his adolescent life living a homosexual lifestyle. He attributes his homosexuality to his childhood. "Family Structure plays a big part in the decisions we make," but admits that curiosity was his strongest link to homosexuality. "Curiosity gets the best of children. They have no idea what they’re doing, and what they’re playing with really comes back to be a demon to haunt you." This demon may come in many forms, says Antron, "it may be something that you were doing, something that you were around, or something that you were exposed to. It becomes an every day idea, and as you grow, that understanding does not change because you don’t know it’s a problem."

At 13 years of age, Antron started to question his sexuality. He asked himself, "why am I thinking about this? Does everybody go through this?" As a young boy, he felt constant

confusion about his homosexual tendencies, and asked himself, "If this is OK, then why am I hiding it?"

Antron was the typical high school teenager. He was popular in school, was involved in extracurricular activities, had girlfriends, and jokingly laughs that he was even "kind of conceited." Yet, he describes his feelings as a dark cloud hovering above him, and admits his popularity came at a cost. "A lot of doors were open to me. You start going to certain places, you start hanging around certain people and before you know it, you’re too far to turn back." He justified his feelings by saying that all men go through this and it was just a phase. "Ultimately I’ll come out of it." After all, he had dreams he wanted to accomplish. "I wanted to have a family. I wanted to have a kid, and a dog. There is just no way that I could be gay."

While his wife Latonia, gently reprimands their two year old daughter, Antron describes the moment he first verbalized to himself that he was gay. "One day, a friend of mine was coming over to the house, and I found myself in the mirror a lot longer than I should have been. That’s when I told myself I am so gay. After that it got to be pretty sick," he says. After coming home from being with a man, "I would call my girlfriend." He was desperately trying to keep his homosexual life a secret. His only desire was to spare his mother the anguish if she found out. "I loved her too much to try to make her understand, and I would do anything to spare her that pain." However, when asked if he had feelings of guilt or depression, the answer is surprising. "There was no depression at all. The only feeling of guilt I had was that I had been going to church with my mother. The guilt came because I knew better. I

knew this could not possibly be right. It wasn’t until I got older that I realized the guilt will weigh a lot more."

While leading this lifestyle, Antron began dating his wife, who was unaware of his involvement with men. They had known each other since junior high. She attended a different high school, and when Antron went away to the military and she went off to college they kept in touch. Years later they pursued a relationship and were married in 1993. Everything appeared to be perfect. "The only problem was the shadow in the back of my mind." He had not told Latonia about his feelings, even less his lifestyle. Instead, he attempted to dissociate with the crowd he was in. He figured, "If I could separate myself from that lifestyle, maybe it will go away." It didn’t work out that way. With his wife at FSU and him stationed in Jacksonville, he continued to have relationships with men during the week, and converted back to husband on the weekends when she would visit him.

God had other plans for Antron, though. When Antron felt a calling on his life to work in the ministry, he knew that he had to give it up "completely" and the only one that can deliver him from this bondage was God. The first step, though, was to tell his wife.

"It took a lot of prayer and I knew that the only way to have total redemption from God was to get off my pride trip and tell people." Two years after the marriage began, Latonia would find out her husband’s deepest secret. "The first thing that went into my mind is ‘I can’t believe this.’ At first I was shocked. It was a huge disillusionment. I had married my first love and now this…my heart was broken." While everyone thought that everything between them was great,

Latonia was going through her own private struggles, and was ready to give up. After trying to come to terms with what he had put her through, he took his pregnant wife to IHOP one morning and gave her a choice. "Would you like to take a Greyhound, or would you like to fly AirSouth?" Neither. Latonia forgave her husband and they began a long road to saving their marriage. It was a daily struggle. Day by day they would make the decision to stay in the marriage. But it was her faith in God’s plan for Antron's life that made everyday brighter and better. Knowing that God had called Antron to His ministry was her incentive, and her goal was to see it realized.

The only thing left for Antron was to confront his mother about it. "God has to be glorified. If you pass the test and you don’t tell the testimony, then God has not gotten the glory. And I could use something this controversial and say, ‘I love my wife, and I want more kids. I’ve tried it and it’s not something I want to do.’ That can be useful in reaching out to others with similar situations"

When Antron told his mother about his homosexuality the lifestyle he led, her answer was: "Raise a child in the way they must go. You departed from it, but you came back because you had the basic understanding of God. If I ever in my life thought that I failed, this would be the one time in my life I know I did not. "

While Latoya plays on the couch with her mother, Antron glimmers with joy. "Look at what I have now. I cannot imagine giving this away." He is now a minister who provides counseling to homosexual men and tells them about the alternative lifestyle. The life of a disciple of Christ. "To be used by God has to be the utmost honor there could be. I know that everything I

went through was for a purpose. We realize that we beat this, and now we have to help others beat it as well. As for us the battle has been won, and the Lord has the victory."